Holy Defiance

In the dream the adults of the community are out in the fields working. It’s the ‘perfect’ community. The community is vegetarian. It works to implement its goals of social justice in the world. It’s environmentally conscious. It’s spiritually aware. It fosters personal & communal growth. I hear the adults of the community singing their beautiful communal songs as they work in the fields. I know they will soon return for the evening meal. Meanwhile; back in the central building, the children of the community are creating a massive marijuana statue.1 I become alarmed. I start to panic. I know any contact with marijuana is against the strict anti-drug rules of the community. There’s going to be a huge clash! I become increasingly anxious as I hear the adults beginning to return. Still the children work on. I know what they are doing is; ‘Holy Defiance.’

My old psychic system has been built around ‘little me’ (or the ego). The old was a necessary step. In many ways my ‘little me’ has been healthy and life bringing; but its time is up. Dreams stalk the inner landscape foretelling the need for change. ‘Holy defiance’ erupts from within. It’s ‘defiance’ because it defies the ‘collective’2 values of my old world, in order to create a new and ‘personal’ universe. It’s ‘holy’ because it’s the precursor of spiritual and psychological rebirth.

I am the crumbling of your world
The perfect… stumbles… twists… & falls…
I am the Self’s ferocious dance
The kiss of love
The second chance

I am the leaning of your tower
The lightning flash… the autumn shower…
I am the turning… still… but sure…
The darkest night
The open door

1 ‘Marijuana’ is illegal. To create a ‘personal universe’ I will learn to break my ego’s collective laws. In particular ‘little me’s’ redundant ‘shoulds’ and ‘should not’s must be challenged.

‘Marijuana’ alters consciousness and creates visionary states. In my new universe I am to learn how to ‘see’ further and ‘see’ differently. The poet William Blake called the Self; ‘Jesus the Imagination.’ Imaginative power is a hallmark of the Self.

2 The process of Self-realisation progressively frees a person from ‘collective values.’ ‘Collectives’ are group belief systems. People within collectives are conditioned by the beliefs and rules of the collective. Many ‘collectives’ (such as consumerism) are accepted blindly by most of the culture. The Self is ‘the Unconditioned.’ It is utterly unique and unsustained by anything outside of itself. It is what it is. During the process of Self-realisation I will connect with my unconditioned core. As I do so I will increasingly become the man I truly am.

Meditation: Sit with the words ‘Holy Defiance.’ How do the words feel? How do they affect your body? Are you aware of a recent dream or life-challenge which is ‘defying’ your old ways of being? Can you give it a name? Try speaking to it. Ask it what it wants? Reflect on your experience. 


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