Roadside Chat’s (10) 8/4/15

It’s three weeks until the purchase of the cottage is confirmed; a month ‘til possession date. The sale is conditional on a LIM report. I settle in at Rarangi to wait it out.

Mornings I wake early to watch the sun rise. I feel full of masculine energy. The Sacred Masculine feeds my soul.

Out of the sea

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My connection with the Sacred Masculine is part of an ongoing initiation. Solitude is a faithful companion. I am to die to all that would lead me away from the path of my wairua.

As I grow, so the challenges grow. Over and over I am taken to my edge… then tipped beyond. ‘Beyond’ is the life I have always longed for.

The call to live ‘beyond’ comes from the World Soul. It comes through dreams and the outer circumstances of my life. It’s a call to serve the highest good in individuals and communities. It’s a call to serve through deep listening, wise questions, straight answers and patient love. It’s a call to integrity. I’m to serve Life.

My days at Rarangi pass slowly. Writing pushes me towards an edge. ‘Roadside chats’ is opening me to the scrutiny of others. What I write is deeply personal. I share the sacred dimensions of life. I share sayings the Self gives me. I share what it means to be fully human. I share the path of love. I share my journey with the Sacred Feminine & Sacred Masculine. I share about sacred sexuality. I share about Elle.

As my transparency grows I feel an increasing tightness. It feels like I’m exposing myself to some terrible danger. Finally there comes the recognition. I feel vulnerable. I share my discovery with Elle. I tell her it feels like I’m coming out… Like I’m sharing who I am with the world… It feels very scary.

Elle tells me she senses my vulnerability. I tell her how the old Master once told a story about the dangers of sharing spiritual pearls with those who are hostile to the world of Spirit. The Master said; ‘be careful or those wild pigs will turn and tear you to pieces.’ Elle replies; ‘but when you’re vulnerable you open a space where people can become vulnerable and explore their own questions and longings.’ Elle’s right. So is Jesus. I must go on.

The next day I drive to Picton and walk to Bobs Bay. Scrawled on a toilet wall I discover these words;

Turn your face toward the sun in your heart

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Follow

The Self is the Sun in my heart… I turn my face towards the Self… step beyond my feelings of vulnerability… trust my feet to follow…

Saturday Elle joins me at Rarangi. We drive up to the cottage. We want to find a path down to the river.

It’s three years since the cottage was built. An earlier hut was destroyed by fire. The new cottage, built with insurance money, has never been occupied. Hot summers and wet winters have turned the section into a lush jungle. We bush bash our way down to the tiny creek at the bottom of the section. It’s there we discover a rough wooden walkway. As we gingerly follow the dilapidated track we realise the bottom part of the section borders old gold workings. We become increasingly excited as we discover a dump of old bottles and a miner’s pick hanging in a tree. Finally we make it to the river.

We strip off our clothes and in we wade. It feels so good to stand in the flow of the Wakamarina. Once again I feel ‘linked in.’ A flow of ‘coincidences’ and ‘linkings’ has led me to this place.

When we make it back up to the cottage Elle hands me a pack of Earth Magic oracle cards. She wants me to choose one.  As I thumb through the book that comes with the cards I notice one of the cards is; ‘The Green Man.’ My heart smiles. ‘The Green Man’ is a personal talisman. It’s been so since a dream in which I encountered a Green Man with my face. I’ve written a number of poems identifying with ‘The Green Man.’ I pick up the cards and give them a good shuffle. I turn a card over. It’s the Green Man.

‘You have the advantage of an incredible synergy at this time. A flow of life is guiding you, where things just seem to be falling into place as you move about your business. You are in a mutually cooperative interaction with Spirit, as your will is aligned with the will of Spirit, and your mission is congruent with your sense of purpose. When this is happening, there is a synergy, a way your life force is continually coming into balance with the forces of Nature.’ (Earth Magic Oracle Cards – Steven D Farmer)

I feel so grateful for the ‘synergy’ and ‘flow of life’ which has brought me to the cottage. It’s only two weeks since Elle and I first drove up the Wakamarina Valley. Since then my world has turned upside down. My intention to travel to Anatori to write in the Camper has been left behind. I now have a writer’s cottage. With winter cold approaching I feel very blessed.

Two days later Elle returns to Christchurch. The following afternoon I get a call from my solicitor. There’s a problem with the LIM report. The aerial map shows the cottage is built on roadside reserve. My solicitor is not hopeful.

Roadside Blessings – Kevin

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